Secure

The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me;

your steadfast love, O LORD, endures forever.

You hem me in, behind and before,

and lay your hand upon me.

Even the darkness is not dark to you,

for darkness is as light with you.

In your book were written the days that were formed for me,

when as yet there was none of them.

~From Psalm 138-139

You are not here by accident.

Your existence, this season of life, these circumstances--none of it is by chance. God is the author of your story. You have been placed right where you need to be. 

Maybe you have a lot of questions. The stress and pain in your life is about to overwhelm you. Your fears once again are getting the best of you. You are crushed under the sting of rejection or abandonment. You are tired of struggling on. Perhaps you want to give up. 

Run to Jesus. He loves you more than life itself. He wants to hold you close, "hem you in," and keep you safe. He can see, even when you can't. 

He is overwhelmingly good. He has promised to make everything work out for good for those who love Him. He is completely trustworthy. He is absolutely able to do as He has promised.

Hang on. He's not finished. If it's not good yet, it's not the end yet!

A Touch of His Hand

“He laid His right hand on me . . .”1

 
In the midst of the awesomeness, 

a touch comes, 

and you know it is the right hand of Jesus Christ. 

You know it is not the hand of restraint, 

correction, 

nor chastisement, 

but the right hand of the Everlasting Father. 

Whenever His hand is laid upon you, 

it gives inexpressible peace  
and comfort, 

and the sense that 

“underneath are the everlasting arms,”2
full of support,

provision, 

comfort, 

and strength.

 
And once His touch comes, 

nothing at all can throw you into fear again. 

In the midst of all His ascended glory, 

the Lord Jesus comes 

to speak to an insignificant disciple, saying, 

“Do not be afraid.”3 

His tenderness is inexpressibly sweet. "

—Oswald Chambers, "My Utmost for His Highest" 

1 (Rev. 1:17) , 2 (Deut. 33:27), 3 (Rev. 1:17)

Little blessings

My little sister with me - Fall '10

Sometimes you pray for God's blessings, for things you need, but overlook the obvious blessings right under your nose.

I've been concerned about some things lately and praying for God's provision. But tonight, He sent me a small Reminder to not worry about tomorrow, but instead to appreciate the beauty of today.

In the form of a little girl's plea, "Rissa, can you read me the Bible tonight?"

You see, if I'm around when my sister Elise is going to bed, I'll often read her to sleep, usually from the Bible, because, "Rissa, you make it interesting and exciting!

Tonight she snuggled into my shoulder as I read from Psalm 139, "You hem me in, behind and before, and lay Your hand upon me."

"Do you know what a hem is?" I asked her.

When she replied yes, I explained, "See, a hem keeps the fabric from being frayed and ripped. Something like that, God hems us in and holds us, so that we're safe from being ruined and torn apart. He protects us."

Her eyes lit up in her signature way and her smile widened. "That's so cool!"

We talked and snuggled for a little while longer, when she stopped and looked at me, stroking my cheek. "Rissa, has anybody told you you're beautiful?"

I smiled and felt my eyes tear up. "Thank you, darling."

I had just showered so my hair was an unruly mop of drying curls, no makeup or anything. I didn't feel all that lovely.

But in taking time to love her, to give her my undivided attention, to share Jesus' love for her, with her... I wasn't even thinking of my looks.

The Apostle Peter said that a gentle and quiet spirit was how the holy women of the past used to make themselves beautiful.

Not necessarily by spending extra time on her appearance. Not by having everything in life under control. Not by doing more, being more, spending more on herself.

No, her beauty lay in her gentle, quiet attitude. Her trust in God's safekeeping leaves her free to give of herself to love and serve others.

Sometimes, in my preoccupation with my own agenda and modern efforts toward making myself beautiful and successful, I forget it, but...

Perhaps the old-fashioned method is still the most effective.

Of plans, hope and love

I was encouraged reading this post over on YLCF recently, and I hope it might be a blessing to you, too!

Trust that [God's] plans are always good and filled with hope.

Trust Him.  He is good.  His love endures forever.

On the days where the father of lies whispers that you’re unlovable, undesirable, an unworthy failure, may you understand that he is the condemned liar.

He wants to deceive you into thinking that the Giver of all good things cannot be trusted just because you do not have a husband or a family.

Don’t believe the lie.

Remember—he’s condemned and defeated by the Jesus Who chose you.

—Nicole Merchant

(Read the rest of the post:  "Dear Single Sisters" @ YLCF )

Expressing Worship

Sometimes I wish I knew how to dance.

Not that I'm especially graceful, but there are times when I feel like I need another way of expressing my heart.

When I want to sing along to worship music but have had a cold and lost my voice.

When my heart is overflowing with emotion and voice alone will not express it.

When my limited piano skills are inadequate.

But… I can raise my hands to my Maker and lift up my voice in praise.
  
I can move my feet in worship anytime I run errands and help others.

I can stretch out my hands to the needy or embrace with compassion those hurting.

This is all worship.

All of this can give a voice to my thankfulness.

And you know what?

I bet God's enjoying it, too.

Never Dropped You Once

Did you ever play on the swing as a kid?

Higher and higher you'd go, closing your eyes and grinning as the wind swept across your face, when you heard a voice in front of you, calling your name.

It was your daddy. "Jump," he'd beckon, holding out his arms. "I'll catch you."

There was never a question of whether he would.

It was safe to let go of the ropes with daddy waiting there, safe to jump when he called,

I'll catch you.

It was perfect security, knowing daddy loved you, that he'd never once dropped you.

Not once.


A few years have passed since then. You're all grown up now, trying to make decisions, maybe kind of worried. Then you hear a voice calling.

It's your Father. "Jump. I'll catch you."

His arms are up to the challenge. He's strong, and He's had a lot of practice. When He calls to you, telling you to jump, you can trust Him.

He will catch you.

After all, He loves you.

And He's never dropped you once.

Filtered Through Fingers of Love

“Joy, peace, and stability come from believing

that every circumstance that touches our lives 

has first been filtered through His fingers of love 

and is part of a great, eternal plan 

that He is working out in this world and in our lives.”

—Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Lies Women Believe

Whoever would draw near to God must believe 

that He rewards those who seek Him.

~From Hebrews 11:6

Faith, Questions & 2010

This past year began with a lot of questions. It's been a year with seemingly no rhyme or reason, settling in at church and work, comfortable in who I am, while at the same time being asked to step out with faith in some ways that honestly scare me.

It's been a year of ups and downs, with time flying by sometimes, and other times dragging on, feeling like life will go on the same way forever. It's offered me a lot of decisions. Held a few awesome road trips, a bunch of great friends and plenty of new experiences. 

It's been a good year.

Christmas time '10
with my best friend and sister

Learning to worship God with all that I am, just because He is worthy, is an incredible experience. Praising Him just because I know He is awesomely faithful, whether everything seems to be going my way or not. Because I have tasted and seen that He is good. Seen Him provide time and again. Witnessed the amazing ways He takes what seems hopelessly broken and fashions something beautiful beyond imagination. Watched disappointments often turn out to be wiser answers to my prayers than my dreams ever were.

Some answers I'm still waiting on. But if I've come away from 2010 with nothing else, I know this: My God is greater than fear, pain or obstacles. Greater than my plans and dreams.

He is the Master Designer, who will fulfill His purposes for my life. He loves through every season of doubt or failure. Gives peace for today and brilliant hope for tomorrow. He doesn't give up on me.

I've mulled over this quote a lot, because it captures my thoughts better than I can:

“I am so flawed that Jesus had to die for me, yet I am so loved and valued that Jesus was glad to die for me. This leads to deep humility and deep confidence at the same time.” -Timothy Keller, The Reason For God

I don't want to waste this Love, or keep it all to myself. I want to place the kind of value on each person that Jesus does, to not give up on them. I want to make a difference, to pass His love on. I don't want to live a little life. And I don't want to love just a little, either. After all, my God loved with everything He had, everything He was. Whether it was well-received or spat back in His face. He loved anyway.

That is what I want to do. These are my ambitions for the new year.

To know my God better. To learn to really love others. To step out of my "boat" when Jesus calls, "Come." Even when I'm scared to cross the sea in front of me. I know Who called me and that He won't let me drown.

I've still got questions. Lots of them. But I know God is piecing together this puzzle into a spectacular masterpiece, and I'm really excited to see what He's going to do in 2011!

Chris Tomlin's "Our God" would have to be my summary song of 2010.

Water You turned into wine
Opened the eyes of the blind
There's no one like You
None like You
Into the darkness You shine
Out of the ashes we rise
There's no one like You
None like You

Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God, You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome in power
Our God, Our God

And if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what can stand against?

Nothing is greater than my God.

This is the God that goes ahead into this year.

When Life is a Question Mark

I have an awful lot of questions.

Me in Thornbury, ON, Fall 2010. Photography by Melody Whitney.

I may not have always asked them out loud, for fear of sounding silly, but for as long as I can remember I've looked at everyday objects, wondered who invented it and how they thought it up. I look at a word and am curious as to how it came to be. When told of God's love, I try to comprehend how could He really see me as blemish-free, and love me not conditioned on my performance. At times, I dare myself, for a split second, to prove whether laws of gravity and physics actually hold true in every case, but my fortunately my brain (or maybe just my self-preservation instinct) kicks in rather swiftly and I disregard the foolish notions.

My sisters have looked at me strange if I would dare to voice my questions out loud. "Wow, you have a strange mind. Where do you come up with these thoughts? It's how it is, so I don't even think about it."

So, most of the time I keep my questions locked inside my head, or silently turn to Google or dictionary.com for answers.

But... *gasp* Google isn't providing the answers to all my questions these days!

What should I be doing with my life? 


Should I go to college? What should I study? How will I pay for everything? 

What if I don't find "the right somebody to love" (as Shirley Temple put it) for a long time… or never?

What if I end up as a career woman all my life, and never have a family of my own?

What if I choose a career and end up hating it? 


How can I make a difference, whether by career, volunteer projects and ministries, or just in the lives of family and those I meet every day?


How can I find and maintain passion and purpose in life, through EVERY season?


These are some of the questions weighing on my heart in this time of entering adulthood. Sometimes it feels more like breaking and entering, like it's a foreign place where I'm not sure I belong.

These are things that have kept me running to God.

Crying.

Searching.

Clinging.

Waiting.

These are what pull me closer to His heart, until I'm near enough to feel His heartbeat. Close enough to hear Him whisper, "I love you," as His embrace assures me that it's going to be okay. Close enough to realize that He would never leave me abandoned or cause me pain unnecessarily.

"I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jer. 29:11)

He is good. I know this much. The rest? Does it really matter so much whether I know?

I know He's led me this far.

He's gonna continue.

Waiting

Have you not known? 

Have you not heard? 

The Lord is the everlasting God… 

He does not faint or grow weary; 

His understanding is [beyond our comprehension]. 

Thornbury, ON ~ Photography by Melody Whitney

He gives power to the fainting… 
They who wait [or, watch in expectation] for the Lord 

will renew their strength; 

They will [soar above the storms] like eagles; 

They will run and not be weary; 

They will walk and not faint. 

~Isaiah 40:28-31

The Gift of Thorns

"It seems that His servants who are used in special ways 

often experience commensurate trials. These trials 

are simultaneously burdens God gives 

to keep them utterly dependent; 

and thorns which pin back the veil that hides His face. 

In a fallen world, they are gifts." 

—Sono Harris (emphasis mine)

The Time In Between

"For still the vision awaits its appointed time… 

If it seems slow, wait for it; 

it will surely come."

—Habakkuk 2:3

Don't take much for this crazy world

To rob me of my peace

And the enemy of my soul

Says You’re holding out on me

So I stand here lifting empty hands

For you to fill me up again

But it’s the time in between

That I fall down to my knees

Waiting on what You'll bring

And the things that I can't see

I know my song’s incomplete

Still I'll sing in the time in between

—Francesca Battistelli 

"Time In Between" from My Paper Heart (c) 2008

On one condition...

"He will use you to accomplish great things
on the condition that you believe much more in His love
than in your own weakness."
—Mother Theresa

"Bless the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all His benefits,
who forgives... who heals...
who redeems your life...
who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,
who satisfies you with good...
As a father shows compassion to his children,
so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear Him.
For He knows our frame;
He remembers that we are dust."
—Psalm 103:2-5, 13-14

Just As He Promised

Spring is arriving in my part of the world.

And with it, the promise of life. With a glorious burst of colour, the earth displays a beauty and vibrance that winter has done her shivering best to make us forget. Almost, she succeeds. Almost, we despair of spring's arrival.

Then she comes. At last. We feel her warm smile in the sunshine. Her loveliness is accented by the colourful clothing she wears.

She brings hope.

Sunshine is here. Better days are coming.

But, let us not alienate poor winter completely. She prepares for spring's arrival in a way summer never could. As strange as it seems, these colourful flowers need to experience winter's harsh, cold temperament in order to reach their potential. The richness of their beauty would not be possible without winter. She holds the seeds until spring arrives, and during her watch, they die.

But that's not the end of the story.

Seems like it is, doesn't it? Death seems pretty final. Those seeds are dead. But, in the mystery of His plan, the Father leaves those seeds for a while, dead. Until there seems to be no hope of beauty, of resurrection.

Then He brings them to life. Miraculous life. Kinda like He did with His Son on that Resurrection morning all those years ago.

Three days dead. Sealed in the tomb. Bound. Where was the hope for His disciples? Their Master, their Messiah, their Deliverer, their Friend... dead.

But wait.

There He was. He was alive!

Just as He promised.

"Why do you seek the living among the dead?
He is not here, but has risen.
Remember how He told you,
while He was still in Galilee,
that the Son of Man must be
delivered into the hands of sinful men
and be crucified
and on the third day rise."
—Luke 24:5b-7

Jesus Christ died so that we can live. The cross was my just punishment for my sin and self-worship, but He carried the full weight of it for me. As I gratefully accept His payment, like a spring flood He washes my wrongs off the record. I am clean and new. I have life!

Before the throne of God above
I have a strong and perfect plea
A great High Priest whose name is love
Who ever lives and pleads for me

Because the sinless Savior died
My sinful soul is counted free
For God, the Just, is satisfied
To look on Him and pardon me

But as He lives, I also share in His death. As I walk in His steps, seeking to become more like Him, He will ask countless "little" deaths of me. Yet as we walk on together, it becomes clearer that in that death, there is abundant life.

Just as He promised.

Behold Him there, the risen Lamb
My perfect, spotless righteousness
The great unchangeable I AM
The King of Glory and of Grace
One with Himself I cannot die
My soul is purchased by His blood
My life is hid with Christ on high
With Christ my Savior and my God

Happy Resurrection Sunday to you all!

Unmarked quotations taken from the Hymn, "Before The Throne of God Above" by Charitie Bancroft, Public Domain

Happy To Be His Girl

I've been thinking a lot lately about the concept of Jesus as our betrothed bridegroom.

How many brides-to-be have you known who are worried as they wait for a coming surprise from their fiancé? Personally, I haven't seen many. But why is that?

Because a bride knows and loves her beloved and trusts his love for her. She knows whatever he's planning is gonna be awesome, that she's gonna love it, and that she'll enjoy going anywhere as long as it's with him. (And she knows he wouldn't dream of surprising her with something she wouldn't like.)

My friend has had some advice for me,

"Let God surprise you. Learn to enjoy the suspense." —Anna Kraft 

I'm not usually very keen on surprises—I've "wanted to know" whatever is going on, all my life! But one thing I do know is, whatever He's up to, it's gonna be awesome! I can know that, because I'm confident in the unfailing love of my Beloved. I know His heart is "kind beyond all measure." To Him, I am His princess. He delights in me. I want to prize and cherish that love. To trust Him with my heart, my life, my happiness.

I want the world to know I'm happy in His love, and ever so happy to be His girl.

It may be in the valley, where countless dangers hide;
It may be in the sunshine that I, in peace, abide;
But this one thing I know—though it be dark or fair,
If Jesus goes with me, I’ll go anywhere!

If Jesus goes with me, I’ll go anywhere!
’Tis heaven to me, where’er I may be, if He is there!
…If to go or stay, or whether here or there,
I’ll be, with my Saviour, content anywhere!

                     —Charles A. Miles, Public Domain

The Most Beautiful Love

A passage I absolutely love, because nothing else in life compares to God's overwhelmingly faithful, tender love.
I may disappoint people; they may disappoint me. But even when I disappoint this Lover, He never gives up on me and - what I still can't wrap my head around - still is actually delighted and rejoicing to have me near Him and calls me His royal jewel, His beautiful bride.


"For Zion’s sake I will not keep silent,

and for Jerusalem’s sake I will not be quiet,

until her righteousness goes forth as brightness,

and her salvation as a burning torch.

"You shall be a crown of beauty in the hand of the LORD,

and a royal diadem in the hand of your God.

You shall be called My Delight Is in Her,

for the LORD delights in you.

As the bridegroom rejoices over the bride,

so shall your God rejoice over you."

~From Isaiah 62:1,3-5 (ESV)

So, I Wait...

"Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good!

Those who fear him have no lack!

Those who seek the LORD lack no good thing."

-From Psalm 34:8-10

Hungry I come to You

For I know You satisfy.

I am empty, but I know

Your love does not run dry;

So I wait for You.

I'm falling on my knees

Offering all of me

Broken, I run to You

For Your arms are open wide.

I am weary, but I know Your touch

Restores my life;

So I wait for You.

-Kutless, "Hungry" from the album It Is Well

Unfailing Love (In Every Season: Part 2 of 2)

(Missed Part I? Read it here!)

Sure enough, spring came in its own sweet time. With it began the slow, steady process of physical healing. My sister's beautiful wedding. The gift of plane tickets to visit a dear friend. Children's ministry opportunities. Hope was planted. I had no job, no idea where life was heading, but I was content. I was happy enjoying spring and daydreaming of summer, hoping it wasn't far away. But God loved me, had always provided and He knew what He was doing, so why should I worry?

When summer arrived, it seemed like hope's tiny rosebuds burst into full bloom with colour more glorious than I had ever before seen. Where did all this beauty come from and why had God chosen me to receive this enormous bouquet?

I savoured it. It was the most amazing gift I had ever been given. I clung to it with both hands, not daring to let it go. I didn't deserve it... not at all. But it was unequalled in beauty and I felt so cherished. I loved it.

Autumn appeared, and as the weather got cooler, the wind picked up, and the petals began to fall from my beautiful roses until all that remained was the seeds at the centre. I was left tightly grasping nearly bare stems, shielding the seeds from the elements, lest they too escape me.

I questioned. Yes. I was confused. Why would my Lover give me such a gift... only to tantalize me as I watch it be ripped apart and its beautiful petals scattered by the wind only a short while afterwards? I felt betrayed, like He was less than honest with me when He gave it. If I had only known it was so fragile, I would have... would have... what? Refused it? Enjoyed it less?

No. It was a beautiful gift. The brevity of its lifespan could subtract nothing from its beauty. It gave me a glimpse of just how much He loves me, and now I refocus my attention on my Lover Himself. He really was so immensely kind in giving such an exquisite gift. And, though I have little left of the gift, I know, without doubt, the depth of His love. He stayed close by, observing my fascination with His gift. He was always ready when I wanted to talk with Him, when I needed advice or a listening ear, whenever I needed His help. Even when I was too busy, enraptured by His gift, He pursued me and sought me out, and never let me wander too far.

But. I have little hope seeds left on these bare stems. They're all I have left of the roses, and I'm holding them tightly. He asks that I give them back to Him. I wince. Jesus, you know how I'm sentimental that way. Can't I keep them in memory of it?

His hand tenderly rests on my arm. You know I love you. So trust Me with those seeds.

I glance at the Hands holding me. Strong, steady, gentle Hands that have never been unkind to me. My gaze travels to His face, to His eyes so full of love and tenderness, and, as I slowly hand him the leftovers of my bouquet, he takes the remains and prepares the seeds for planting.

He smiles. It'll take time and the cold of winter. There, buried in the dark ground, they'll die. But, leave them alone, and, in the spring, they will grow. In time, you'll have many more roses than just a bouquet, and you and anyone that passes by can enjoy their beauty.

How kind He is. How wise. How very, very good to me. And to think that, in my shortsightedness, I can consider forfeiting all this just to hold on to some dead stems?

I'll leave you with this quote from Charles Spurgeon:

“Remember this: 
had any other condition been better for you 
than the one in which you are, 
Divine love would have put you there.”

Unbelievable Grace (In Every Season: Part 1 of 2)

I do a year-in-review note for myself and my friends every year, but this year called for something a little different. I knew I needed to summarize 2009 somehow. To tell the faithfulness of my amazing God, especially this year, but didn't know quite how to do it.

Well, after reading a blog post by a friend this fall, I got to thinking about seasons. I noticed how closely life can resemble nature's seasons and was compelled to start writing about my year along those lines. So, while it's different in style than usual and a little longer, here is my year-in-review story, Part I:

I'll begin where the calendar did, with winter. My least favourite season. The earth around is dead and lifeless, lacking the vibrant colour and fruitfulness of the other seasons. Sure, I enjoy snowball fights and playing in the snow with the kids, wool coats and tall boots, hot tea and Christmas, but the best part of winter is knowing spring will follow.

Last winter was hard. I spent a lot of time in doctor's offices, filling out a lot of paperwork, and dealing with the big mess of a workplace injury that left me without a job and, at least for a season, without many of the physical capabilities that I usually took for granted.

I had so many of questions for God. I knew He wasn't obligated to give me reasons, to tell me why and what He was doing. I knew better than to question whether He was in control or whether He had good plans in mind. But still. It was five months of, often intense, rhetorical questioning: WHY?! Months of fighting bitterness as continued work made things worse. Fighting for faith when I couldn't see an end to the pain.

Growing up, I've been kind of proud of being the strong one, the healthy one. The one that rarely gets down sick and never had to see a doctor. I may not have many special skills, but I could manage nearly any manual labour anyone gave me to do, and employers were certainly no exception. Suddenly that all changed. Now I not only was useless to my employer, but to my family, and, to some degree, myself. I just plain needed help and I very much resented that. God, surely I'm more useful when healthy and strong? I'm sure I could serve You a lot better if this would just go away!

(Or, maybe not. Maybe He could better use someone not so self-sufficient?)

It was a season of silence. Cold silence. But, not unlike the intensity of winter's sunbeams, the support of true friends was priceless and renewed my hope that spring would come and bring life to my world. Winter couldn't last forever.

(Continue to Part II!)

Grace. Love. And 2009.

Wow. 2009 is over.

So much has happened in a year. So much has changed. But I still have the same gracious, faithful, completely trustworthy God who is as sovereign and worthy of worship as ever. Never have I been so sure of that as now. He is good. Always. And His love never ends.

He truly has “crowned the year with His goodness,” with mercies new every morning, with everlasting love, and I'm excited to see what 2010 will hold!

I think this is my summary song of 2009:

I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing

—Chris Tomlin, "How Can I Keep From Singing"

May God go with you and bless you with a beautiful 2010!

(Author's Note: A related two-part series is upcoming! It will deal more with the past year, with its questions, Answer, pain, joy, disappointments, and blessing.)